The 4 Objectively Best Super Bowls

 Ah, yes, the Super Bowl, probably the most anticipated championship game every year. Just recently, the NFL hit a milestone with their 60th Super Bowl. With 60 Super Bowls, it becomes easy to compare and contrast them, marking each Super Bowl as better or worse, which in turn begs a list of Super Bowl rankings. Such a list would always seem to be subjective, for it would come down to the opinion of each individual. What if, however, a way existed to objectively score Super Bowls, aside from the opinion of someone, which in turn would make a ranking list more objective and less subjective? I believe I have discovered such a method. From this method, a top 4 best Super Bowls emerges. In this post, I will reveal the objectively top 4 Super Bowls. Before conversing on the top 4 Super Bowls, however, I would like to discuss the criteria for objecting scoring the Super Bowls.

The Method

What makes a good or great Super Bowl comes down to 3 criteria. Below I will list these 3 criteria, and I will also defend why they make a Super Bowl good or great. I will also comment on the objectivity and subjectivity of each criterion.

High Scoring

Let's be honest here, nobody wants to see a defensive competition. Defense may win championships, but offensive wins games, and to get to the Big Game, a team has to win games, and they have to do so by scoring a lot of points. That's what fans remember of these teams, and that's what fans want to see. They want to see scores in the Super Bowl. I will define a high score as scoring 28 or more points, for 28 points means the team averages a touchdown and an extra point, the most common score, at least once a quarter. If both teams accomplish 28 or more points, the Super Bowl will be labeled a very high scoring Super Bowl, and it will get 2 points. If only 1 team achieves 28 or more points, the Super Bowl will be labeled just a high scoring Super Bowl, and it will get 1 point. If neither team can obtain 28 or more points, the Super Bowl will be labeled not high scoring, and it will get 0 points. This criterion is minorly subjective. If a Super Bowl goes three quarters with little to no scoring, and then scoring picks up in the 4th quarter due to sloppy defense, the game does not feel like a high scoring game (this has happened). Nevertheless, a score is a score, no matter when the score happens. Therefore, the final score is a minorly subjective measurement for a high scoring game.

Close Scoring

Let's be real here, no one wants to see a runaway score. The only people who enjoy a runaway score are the fans of the winning team. Everyone else hates a runaway score, especially the fans of the losing team. Spectators want to see a close, a game either team can win all the way to end. The determining factor will be the final score. A final score with a differential of 3 or less points will be declared a very close game, for a good field goal would either tie or win the game (and that means the team merely has to get in field goal range, not in the endzone), and it will receive 2 points. A final score differential between 4 and 8 points will be just a close game, for a touchdown (with or without an extra points, with or without a 2-point conversion) can win or tie the game, and it will receive 1 point. A game with ends with 9 or more points separating the two points will not be called a close game, for it would take 2 possessions to win or tie the game, and it will receive 0 points. This criterion is moderately subjective. The game could be close for 3 quarters, and then in the 4th quarter, the winning team takes off, making the score look like it never was close at all (this has happened). The game could be a runaway for 3 quarters, and then, in the 4th quarter, the losing team starts scoring a lot of points, perhaps due to lazy or overconfident defense, making the score look closer than it actually was (this has also happened). Still, fans will look at the final score and reminisce about how close or how much of a runaway the game was just based on that final score. Therefore, as moderately subjective as this criterion may be, how close the final score is will determine whether a Super Bowl is good or bad.

Comeback

Everybody loves an underdog story. An underdog, however, does not necessarily have to come into the game as an underdog. The game can create an underdog within the game by having one team take a large lead, and then have the other team play catch up to the leading/winning team for the rest of game. This alone creates excitement in the game, and how much more exciting when the losing team overcomes the large deficit and wins! Therefore, a good Super Bowl needs to have a comeback, or at least the potential for a comeback. A successful comeback, in which the losing team was the last team to possess the ball, and then scores, thus winning the game, will receive 2 points. A failed comeback is when the losing team is the last team to possess the ball, but they are unable to score, and that will receive 1 point. If the last team to possess the ball is the winning team, and they are just running out the clock (perhaps quite literally, as the offense of the winning team may just call rushing play after rushing play), that is no comeback, which receives 0 points. The comeback is majorly subjective, for it requires the highest number of rules and stipulations. If the last team to score broke a tie, then revert back to the score before then. If the losing team ties up the game, their defense holds off the opponent's offense from scoring for another drive, and then their offense scores again, that is successful comeback worth 2 points. If the losing team scores to tie up the game, but offense takes the lead again on the next drive, if the losing team gets the ball back with time expiring, that's a 1-point failed comeback, but if the winning team scores as time runs out, that's a 0-point no comeback. What about kneel downs? If ending the game requires 1 kneel down to knock out just a couple or few seconds, that will not be counted as the last possession. If the winning requires multiple kneel downs to run out over a minute of the clock, that will count as the last possession. Determining whether or not kneel downs count as the last possession will also be affected by whether they came off a turnover. Also, hopefully not overstating the obvious, any Super Bowl that has 2-score deficit (9+ point-difference) will automatically receive a no comeback label and 0 points, for even if the losing team scores on the last play of the game, it will not affect who wins the Super Bowl. That alone might make the comeback majorly subjective, for ultimately, it is influenced by the closing scoring criteria, which within itself is moderately subjective.

The objective scoring of whether or not the Super Bowl was high-scoring game, a close-scoring game or a comeback game will result in Super Bowls receiving a score within the range of 0 to 6. With 60 Super Bowls and a score range of 0 to 6, there will be a lot of ties. Tiebreakers will be 100% fully and completely subjective. I will try to keep the subjectivity as close to the immediate context of the game itself, but other factors, such as what happened in the rest of the postseason, the regular season and the preseason, may come into play. Heck, I might even include the halftime show as a deciding factor!

The Results

When all the scoring is said and done (see below), only 1 Super Bowl gets a perfect score of a 6, and only 3 Super Bowls receive a near perfect score of 5. From this method, we can create a ranking of the top 4 Super Bowls. With further ado, counting down, here are the 4 Objectively Best Super Bowls.

4) Super Bowl LVII - Kansas City Chiefs vs. Philadelphia Eagles

You know it has to be a good Super Bowl when I, a Philadelphia Eagles fan, makes a Super Bowl that the Eagles lost a top 4 Super Bowl. Despite my team not winning, I must admit, this was a very enjoyable game to watch. This game had all 3 features of a good Super Bowl. It was a high scoring Super Bowl, as both the Philadelphia Eagles and the Kansas City Chiefs scored over 30 points, making the Philadelphia Eagles the highest scoring Super Bowl loser in NFL history (ironically, the Eagles use to be at the opposite end of this record, as the previous record was held by the Patriots, who scored 33 points in their Super Bowl LII loss against the Eagles). It was a close scoring game, as Philadelphia never got a lead bigger than 10 points, and Kansas City never got a lead bigger than 8 points, with the final score being a 3-point margin. Even with the Eagles 10-point lead, the game never felt out of reach for the Chiefs, and even with the Chiefs 8-point lead, the game never felt out of reach for the Eagles. And I will be generous enough to call Jalen Hurt's sad attempt at a Hail Mary (future note: Hurts can't throw more than 40 yards) a failed comeback (ironically, this is like how Super Bowl LII ended, except again the Eagles were on the other side). Therefore, on a scale of 0 to 6, I give this game a 5. Thus, I must confess, the game was more enjoyable than when the Eagles actually won the Super Bowl in Super Bowl LII, which I can only give a 4 out of 6. The only thing that could have made this Super Bowl better is if the Eagles would have actually made the comeback, and I say that apart from being an Eagles fan. Other factors contribute to making it a good game. Super Bowl LVII received a couple monickers. People called it the Andy Reid Bowl, as Andy Reid previously coached the Eagles and now coached the Chiefs, making him the fourth coach to do so. People also named it the Kelce Bowl, since for the first time in NFL history, brothers played each other in the Super Bowl. As another first in Super Bowl history, the game starred 2 African American quarterback as the  starting quarterback. Speaking of 2 quarterbacks, you got to love the 2 quarterback philosophies at play here. Patrick Mahomes is your traditional AFC pocket passer, yet he's not afraid to run when he see the opportunity, while Jalen Hurts can play the role of passing quarterback and rushing running back equally. Rihanna performing a whole Super Bowl halftime show pregnant also deserves praise. Don't worry, I'm not one of those Eagles fans who will complain about the slippery field or the holding call costing the Eagles the game. The Eagles had one of the best defenses, if not THE best defense, in the NFL. All they had to do was prevent 1 less touchdown. Patrick Mahomes deserved both the season MVP and the Super Bowl MVP for the all the work he did getting the Chiefs to Super Bowl LVII and then winning the Super Bowl. The only reason this Super Bowl does not receive a higher ranking on the list is, simply put, the other 3 Super Bowls just did better. That's all.

3) Super Bowl XXXVIII - New England Patriots vs. Carolina Panthers

Let me set the scene for you. Ever since the New England Patriots upset the St. Louis Rams in Super Bowl XXXVI, and ever since the Philadelphia Eagles almost upset the St. Louis Rams in the same postseason, NFL fans were clamoring for a New England Patriots vs. Philadelphia Eagles Super Bowl. After the 2003 regular season, during the 2003 postseason, it look everything was set up for such a Super Bowl, for both teams made it to their respective conference championship playoff game. New England held up their end with a win against Indianapolis, taking an early lead in the 1st half and holding that lead in the 2nd half. Philadelphia, however, did not hold up their end, as their offense did not show, especially with Donovan McNabb completing only a minority of his passes and also throwing 3 interceptions. Therefore, Super Bowl XXXVIII would end up as a competition between the New England Patriots and the Carolina Panthers. Let me tell you, from the onset, from the conclusion of conference championship Sunday, nobody gave the Panthers even a chance against the Patriots. Indeed, the Patriots entered the Super Bowl as the 7 point favors over the Panthers. At times, however, the game did not look like it had a 7 point favorite. Indeed, the Panthers never scored in the 1st  quarter, but then again, they prevented the Patriots doing so as well. During the 2nd quarter, the Patriots would take the lead twice with 2 touchdowns, but every time the Patriots scored, the Panthers followed up with their own score, albeit the 2nd score was a field goal to respond to the Patriots touchdown. It was still close at halftime. True, the Panthers went scoreless again in the 3rd quarter, but then again, so did the Patriots. It looked like the Patriots would pull away, scoring a touchdown with 14:49 left in the game, taking a an 11-point lead, the largest lead in the entire game. At this point in the Super Bowl, both offenses would explode, for in the 4th quarter, the Panthers would score 18 points, and the Patriots would score 19 points, for a total combined 37 points, the most points scored in a single quarter of the Super Bowl. Carolina would even take the lead at one point, only for New England to take it back, but then Carolina would tie it up again. With only 1:08 left in regulation, it would only take 1 minute 4 seconds and 37 yards for the Brady-led offense to set up up Adam Viniteri for a field, which of course, he made good. With the New England Patriots winning over the Carolina Panthers, 32 to 29, Super Bowl XXXVIII gets 2 points as a high-scoring game, and it receives another 2 points for being a close-scoring game. Unfortunately, I cannot give this Super Bowl the 2 points for a successful comeback. I can't call the Patriots, who had a 7-point favorite coming into game, who had the lead after 7 scores (as opposed to the Panthers, who only took the lead once and tied the game twice), who had at once led by 11 points, and who just had a tie game when they made that last score, a comeback. I will, however, kindly say that the Panthers had a failed comeback, for taking the lead in the 4th quarter as the 7-point underdogs, so this Super Bowl gets 1 point for a failed comeback (see above heading The Method subheading Comeback). Outside the objective points, Super Bowl XXXVIII had some pretty impressive stats. Both New England Patriots QB Tom Brady and Carolina Panthers QB Jake Delhomme passed for over 300 yards. New England wide receiver Deion Branch and Carolina wide receiver Mushid Mohammed both received for over 140 yards. And of course, Janet Jackson's "wardrobe malfunction" during the halftime show cements this Super Bowl into memories of all. Again, the only reason this Super Bowl does not receive a higher ranker is because the 2 higher Super Bowls did it better.

2) Super Bowl XLVII - Baltimore Ravens vs. San Francisco 49ers

Receiving many nicknames, such as Har-Bowl, Super Baugh, Brother Bowl and Super Bro, for the first time the Super Bowl having brothers as the 2 head coaches, Super Bowl XLVII had a lot going for it heading into it. On Baltimore's offense, quarterback Joe Flacco is playing the best footfall he has ever played. On the Ravens defense, Ray Lewis has returned for 1 more year for 1 last attempt at the Lombardi Trophy. Combining Ray Lewis with Haloti Ngata, Courtney Upshaw, Terrell Suggs, Corey Graham, Cary Williams and Ed Reed has produced the best defense the Ravens have seen since the defense that went to and won Super Bowl XXXV. On San Francisco's offense, QB Colin Kaepernick has silenced all critics who believe that former Heisman winner Alex Smith should start over him. On the 49ers' defense, they have 6 Pro Bowlers, which have majorly contributed to the 49ers on average allowing 17 point per game, 2nd best in the NFL. Both teams would have to overcome a deficit in their respective conference championship game, with the Baltimore Ravens at one point losing 7 to 13, and the San Francisco 49ers losing 0 to 17, but when all was said and done in both conference championship games, it was determined that Super Bowl XLVII would have the Baltimore Ravens face off against the San Francisco 49ers. The Baltimore Ravens score first with a touchdown pass from Joe Flacco to Anquan Boldin. The 49ers can only respond with David Akers kicking a 35-yard field goal. The 1st quarter concludes with Baltimore winning 7 to 3. During the 2nd quarter, Joe Flacco adds another 2 touchdown passes to his stats sheet, with 1 as a small 1-yard pass to Dennis Pitta and another being a big 56-yard pass to Jacoby Jones. All San Francisco can do in response is another field goal David Akers as the clock for the 1st half expires. At halftime, the Ravens still have the lead over the 49ers, but this time, by more, with a score of 21 to 6. During the halftime show, Beyonce comes out to perform. Her outfit makes her look like She-Hulk, but she surprises everybody with a Destiny Child's reunion, a reunion that has not happened since the trio broke up in 2006. For the 2nd half kickoff, the Baltimore Ravens receive the ball, and Baltimore kick returner Jacoby Jones runs back the kickoff 108 yards for a touchdown, which is not only the longest kickoff return in Super Bowl history, it's the longest play in Super Bowl history. It looks like the Ravens have sealed the game. It looks like it's going to be one of those Super Bowls in which the winning team beats up the losing team with a runaway score. Then, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, with no warning, half the lights go out. It takes 22 minutes for the stadium to return to full power, and another 12 minutes to players to get warmed up again, for a total of 34 minutes without play. Conspiracy theorists will tell you that the NFL cut the power to buy the 49ers more time to regroup, but any NFL player will tell you how hard it is to warm up for a game again after such a long period of inactivity. The Super Bowl halftime show already extends halftime longer than players would like; a partial power outage extending that downtime for another 34 minutes players would hate. While 34 minutes of inactivity on the field bored audiences, it somehow benefited the San Francisco 49ers. The rest of the 3rd quarter consists of San Francisco scoring 2 touchdowns (a 31-yard pass from Colin Kaepernick to Michael Crabtree and a 6-yard rush by Frank Gore) and 1 field goal, now putting the 49ers behind by only 5 points. In the beginning of the 4th quarter, Justin Tucker extends the Baltimore Ravens lead by 8 points with a 19-yard field goal, but Colin Kaepernick quickly catches the San Francisco 49ers up by scoring a touchdown with a 15-yard rush. Fortunately for Baltimore, San Francisco cannot convert the 2 point conversion. The Ravens respond with another Tucker field goal, increasing their lead to 5 points. On their next drive, it looked like the 49ers would take the lead, but a no-call pass interference in the end zone on 4th down resulted in a turn over on downs with 1:46 left on the clock. In 3 plays, the Baltimore Ravens ran the clock down to 12 seconds. On 4th down, Baltimore punter Sam Koch ran around in the endzone for 8 seconds, and then took a voluntarily safety by running out of the endzone, reducing the point margin by 3 points with 4 seconds left on the clock. For the last play of the game, for the free kick that comes with a safety, returner Ted Ginn, Jr. could make it 31 yards, but he could not make it to the end zone. The final score: Baltimore Ravens - 34, San Francisco 49ers - 31. Joe Flacco takes home Super Bowl MVP for his 287 passing yards and 3 touchdowns, earning a 124.2 passer rating, and in all honesty, it was nice to see the AFC represented by a quarterback was not Tom Brady, Peyton Manning or Ben Roethlisberger (only time between 2001 season and 2018 season). Super Bowl XLVII was very high scoring, albeit Baltimore did most of their scoring in the 1st half and San Francisco did most of their scoring in the 2nd half. The Super Bowl was very close scoring, even if it didn't get very close until the 2nd half. This game I will consider a failed comeback, not only since the 49ers technically last possessed yet failed to score, but also because they erased a 22-point decifit down to 2 points, yet they could never take the lead. Of all the 5-point Super Bowls, Super Bowl XLVII is the best one. The only reason Super Bowl XLVII is not ranked the number 1 Super Bowl on this list is because there is 1 Super Bowl that scored a perfect 6 and is an extremely good Super Bowl.

1) Super Bowl LI - New England Patriots vs. Atlanta Falcons

I know 28-3 has been memed to death, but that meme score explains why Super Bowl LI gets a perfect score of 6. It gets 2 points for being a very high scoring game, for both teams score 28 points in regulation, albeit the Atlanta Falcons score them all in 2 quarters and the New England Patriots score most of it in 1 quarter. It receives 2 points for being a close game. True, for 43 minutes of game time, it was not close, but the fact that New England got the final score at the end of regulation tied (first time in Super Bowl history, only the second time in NFL championship history, with the first one happening in 1958!) a 0 point margin at the end of regulation is the closest a game can get! It earns another 2 points for a successful comeback. The last team to score in Super Bowl LI was the New England Patriots to break the tie for the win. The team penultimate score in the Super Bowl was New England to tie the game. As a matter of fact, the Patriots scored 5 times in a row for a grand total of 31 unanswered points to overcome a 25-point deficit. If that isn't a comeback, then what is?! Outside the objective scoring, other factors contribute to marking Super Bowl LI as the best Super Bowl. The Atlanta Falcons offense, led by quarterback Matt Ryan have the best offense in the NFL this year, the best offense the team has seen since 1999, the team that went to Super Bowl XXXIII. Indubitably, Matt Ryan deserved his regular season MVP, for he has played the best football he has ever played. Matt Ryan received the nickname "Matty Ice" for his ability to stay cool under pressure, but up to this point in his professional career, the nickname seem to more reflect how he froze in the playoffs. This postseason, however, Matty Ice seemed to overcome it, with a decisive victory in the divisional playoffs against the Seattle Seahawks and another decisive win in the conference playoffs versus the Green Bay Packers. Finally, Matt Ryan will get to play in the Super Bowl. Meanwhile, on the New England Patriots side, critics have already dismissed Tom Brady as past his prime. These same critics still insist that the only reason the Brady-led Patriots won Super Bowl XLIX was due to Pete Carroll making a bad play call, not because of anything Tom Brady did. Even with a 14-2 regular season record, even with a decisive victory in the divisional playoffs against the Houston Texans and another decisive win in the conference playoffs versus the Pittsburgh Steelers, New England can secure only a 3-point favorite going into the Super Bowl. At first, Matt Ryan keeps up with his MVP caliber, passing for 284 and 2 touchdowns, earning him at 144.1 passer rating, but then the Matty Ice known more for freezing in the postseason than for staying cool under stress rears his ugly head. Meanwhile, Tom Brady does not give up, and he ends up passing for 466 yards and 2 touchdowns. Also, let's not forget that halftime show with Lady Gaga! Lady Gaga has built up this reputation for her antics, especially in her dresses (the meat dress sticks out in memory), but this halftime show proved that Lady Gaga can actually perform aside from the antics. Lady Gaga's halftime show is the icing to this Super Bowl cake; it's the cherry to this Super Bowl Sundae/Sunday. Indeed, Super Bowl LI definitely deserves a perfect score of 6. It was an extremely good Super Bowl.

The Data

Below is the raw data of how all 60 Super Bowls scored, based off of my objective scoring. As mentioned above, only 1 Super Bowl scored all 6 points, earning the honor of being considered an extremely good Super Bowl. Also discussed above, 4 Super Bowls scored 5 of 6 points, deserving the title of a very good Super Bowl. 5 Super Bowls collected 4 points, and thus can be called a good Super Bowl. 8 Super Bowls accumulated 3 points, which I would call an average/mediocre/meh Super Bowl. 6 Super Bowls only accomplished 2 points, which I would denote as a bad Super Bowl. 25 Super Bowls only achieved 1 point, which I would mark as a very bad Super Bowl. 12 Super Bowls did not get any points at all, making them extremely bad Super Bowls. As evident from the date, the mode score is a 1. This feat can be attributed to several Super Bowls during the late 80s and early 90s in which the winning team ran away with the win with a high score. Obviously, when only 1 team scores 28 or more points, it's hard for the game to be close or for a comeback to happen, hence why only 1 point. Like I said above, the only people enjoying that Super Bowl is the fans of the winning team. Please note that the data below only accurately records the ranking for the top 4 best Super Bowls. Consider all the good Super Bowls with a score of 4 in a 5-way tie for 5th best, all the average/mediocre/meh Super Bowls with a score of 3 in a 8-way tie for 6th best, all the bad Super Bowls with a score of 2 points in a 6-way tie for 7th best, all the very bad Super Bowls with a score of 1 point in a 25-way tie for 8th best, and all the extreme bad Super Bowls with a score of 0 points in a 12-tie for 9th place. Perhaps if in the near future a Super Bowl can at least score 4 points on my objective scale, I will revisit this list, ranking all Super Bowls with a 4+ score to create a top 10 list.

Wario Land: Shake It!

Wario Land: Shake It!
Developer: Good-Feel
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: Wii
System Played On: Wii U
Rating: 3 stars 

On September 3, 2025, I defeated the Shake King, thus finishing Wario Land: Shake It for the Nintendo Wii (played via the background compatibility of my Wii U). In my playthrough, I collected 74% stages, 43% treasures and 11% missions. And I did it all in 10 2/3 gameplay hours over a span of a little over about 2 months. 

Wario Land: Shake It deserves all the praise it has received for it aesthetic. Wario Land: Shake It decided to go with an anime art style, and it's beautiful, gorgeous enough to rival a Studio Ghibli film. Even more impressive, Wario Land: Shake It uses its anime art style in both cutscenes and in gameplay, and the game smoothly transitions between the two of them. Even current gen consoles using photorealistic graphics in both their cutscenes and gameplay still have jarring noticeable differences between cutscenes and gameplay, yet a 7th gen console (and the Wii, as opposed to the PS3 or Xbox360, nonetheless!) using an anime art style can somehow do it. Seriously, this game is so stunning visually, that I sometimes forgot I was playing a video game, and I thought I was watching an anime movie or television show. For that alone, I would recommend this game to any otaku or weeb!

Although not praised as much yet still praised a lot, Wario Land: Shake It deserves all the praise it has received for its soundtrack. Seriously, I haven't hear so much music genre variety since Paper Mario: Color Splash (yeah, I know Paper Mario: Color Splash came after Wario Land: Shake It, but that's not the order I played them)! Furthermore, all the songs on the soundtrack are well orchestrated, instead of relying on some kind of computer synthesizer. My only complaint about the soundtrack is that the music did not always match the theme of the level, but unless actively listening for that incompatibility, nobody will notice. I personally did not notice until other reviews brought it up to me.

Not receiving praise yet it should, Wario Land: Shake It deserves praise for its screen use. See, Wario Land: Shake It came out in 2008, a year in which media outlets and consumers alike transitioned from the 4:3 ratio CRTVs to 16:9 ratio HDTVs. Video game designers, not knowing which TV their consumers owned, had to somehow account for owners of both types of televisions. Some developers would simply make the game only in the 4:3 ratio, leaving gamers on a 16:9 ratio HDTV with black void columns to the left and to the right (see WarioWare: Smooth Moves, for example). Likewise, some designers would add a static border, which is just a step up from the black void. Other developers would simply stretch out a 4:3 ratio to a 16:9 ratio for those using HDTVs, but that would distort the picture. Other designers would extend the visable screen for those using HDTVs, but with a game primarily made with the 4:3 ratio of CRTVs in mind, seeing extra screen adds little to no benefit to gameplay. Wario Land: Shake It solves this problem in an interesting way. The developers designed the game in 4:3 ratio for gamers still gaming on a CRTV, but for the players playing on the 16:9 ratio of HDTV, to the left and the right of the gameplay screen are borders that keep track of treasures and missions. Again, those gaming on 4:3 CRTVs miss out on nothing, and those playing on 16:9 HDTVs gain an additional benefit of a treasures and missions tracker. I thought this was pretty cool! I'm surprised more games of the time period did not do this.

Of course, as a Wii game, Wario Land: Shake It has motion controls. I have nothing against motion controls. I do not object to them at all. As a matter of fact, I firmly believe that motion controls have a crucial role in reaching true virtual reality. My only critique of motion controls, however, lies on the fact that motion control matches the motion made in real life. Following this simple principle explains why Wii Sports became such a success (outside its pack-in status with the Wii). Wii Tennis feels like swinging a tennis racket, Wii Golf feels like swinging a golf club, Wii Bowling feels like rolling a bowling ball, Wii Baseball feels like pitching & hitting, and Wii Boxing feels like throwing a punch (OK, sometimes it feels like slapping). Motion controls should never merely substitute a button press. Wario Land: Shake It is so inconsistent on this. I can comprehend shaking the Wiimote is like shaking money out of a bag. I can understanding slamming down the Wiimote to simulate punching the ground. Shaking the Wiimote to get Wario to swing on a bar does not compute. Tilting the Wiimote to change the angle of a cannon or to get a bucket car to move along the track does not make sense either (I don't equate this to tilting a joystick or leaning the body).

As with most video games (open world video games as the exception), Wario Land: Shake It progressively unveils the map. Wario Land: Shake It takes revealing the map in an interesting way. After beating each boss, Wario goes back to the Pirate Shop on Captain Syrup's ship the Sweet Stuff to find a map of the next continent available. The game never provides an explanation for this. The game never claims that defeating the boss lifted some kind of fog covering the land. The game doesn't even try to convince that Captain Syrup just so happens to find a lost map piece by accident at the same exact time Wario defeated the boss. The map piece just ends up there. Without a game explanation, it leave anyone wondering why the Pirate Shop couldn't have all the continent maps immediately available. It would not have taken that much effort to make up an in-game explanation. Of course, since these maps come from a Pirate Shop, they cost in-game currency to obtain. Naturally, the price increases as the game progresses. As a result, advancing in the game can come to a halt if failing to collect enough in-game currency. In turn, this can create unnecessary padding, forcing backtracking to replay level previously tread, just to collect more currency. Fortunately for me, I ended up 100% fully completing the first few levels (collecting all treasures and missions) just in the attempt to collect more currency to purchase the next continent map. If the developers had this in mind, good for them. If the designers did not intend for this, then they have created an example of unnecessary padding. Speaking of the map, my gameplay progress revealed that I uncovered 74% of the stages. That's because some of the levels had secret, hidden maps, which need to be discovered in the level. If playing a repeat playthrough after beating the final boss, the ground will sparkle where the secret map is buried. If playing the level for the first time, no such indicator exists, despite the fact the gamer can still dig up the hidden map if discovering, even if with some help (like a walkthrough). It was totally unnecessary to keep these maps so secret and hidden with no indicators on the first playthrough and then to give hints on repeat playthroughs. Make the hints available immediately, and then make the challenge reaching said map.

Yes, Captain Syrup makes her return for the first time since Wario Land II, and she fits in exactly where she left off as a character. She steals, she kidnaps, she deceives, she overcharges and she flirts, all in the name of making more money and getting richer. Her return never felt like a shoe-in for the sake of invoking feelings of nostalgia. She returned for the sake of fulfilling a role that fit her character, which I can appreciate. (Speaking of Captain Syrup, make I make sidebar here? Common video game knowledge will reveal that Waluigi came in existence for the sake of creating Wario a partner for sports game that played doubles, like tennis. Waluigi does indeed work as a Wario version of Luigi, but it begs the question, "Why wasn't Captain Syrup Wario's doubles partner?" After all, Captain Syrup is just a female version of Wario. It would have been nice to have Captain Syrup be Wario's doubles partner, for it would have been the first mixed gender partners.)

[SPOILER ALERT!!] The final boss the Shake King (probably a wordplay on Viking) had me intrigued at first, but then it lost my interest. At first, the Shake King attacks with a dash attack, a earthquake punch and fireballs. Minus the fireballs, the Shake King shares the same attacks as Wario, so the final boss battle at first feels like an equal and fair match between Wario and the Shake King to determine who can utilize the attacks the best. The Shake King's second phase has the same or similar attacks, just more of them, so it feels like an expected and necessary harder test. For the third and final phase, however, the Shake King starts pulling out magic that has never occurred in the entirety of the game. Some of these attacks cane one-hit KO Wario or close to it. This felt so unfair. Final boss battles should feel like a final test on how to utilize all controls and attacks. I had no way to prepare for this final boss battle. The best way way to prepare was to fight the Shake King over and over again. Doing so made phase 1 and 2 quite boring, for the gamer will learn the patterns so well, to the point of delivering all the damage while taking no damage. After all, Wario will need all the life he can get for those final phase attacks! Speaking of which, the game does allow the player to purchase a health potion at the Pirate Shop, which will automatically refill the health bar once all health runs out in battle. Actually, Wario has health potions at his disposal throughout the whole game, but not until the final boss battle does health potions feel absolutely necessary because of the unfairness of the final boss battle. Of course, health potions coming from the Pirate Shop means that they cost in-game currency. If the gamer does not have enough, it will require backtracking to previous levels to earn more currency. Let's say the player earns enough money, purchases a health potion, fights the Shake King, and then loses the final boss battle. The gamer will not get the health potion back. The player must buy another one. If Wario does not have enough money, back to grinding for coins in the prior levels! While this system rewards those who learn the Shake King's patterns, this is not fun. It should have stayed a fair fight between Wario and the Shake King over who knew and utilized the attacks the best, like in Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins (ironically) [/END SPOILERS]

In conclusion, Wario Land: Shake It is another Wario Land game that once again zooms in and focuses too much on the gimmick of its original system, which in this case, is the motion controls of the Wii. The problem with such a heavy reliance on the gimmick of the Wii's motion controls lies within the disconnect between the motion control input and the action the motion controls should represent. It is such a shame, for the game has a great music soundtrack, great art style and great screen use. Not only do motion controls mar the game's great points, questionable gameplay mechanics and a final boss battle somewhere between unfair and not fun further mar the game's great points. All in all, the highs match the lows, leaving a game somewhere between average and mediocre. That too is a shame because Wario Land: Shake It trends the Wario Land series in an upward direction. True, Wario Land: Shake It does not return the Wario Land series to the glory days of the first 4 games, especially in comparison to Wario Land 4. Wario Land: Shake It, however, does find a way to zoom in and focus on the original system's gimmick yet incorporate the elements that made Wario Land fans fall in love with Wario Land in the first place. This series looked like it could improved to its former glory days, yet Nintendo decided to cut it off, with its last entry on the Wii. That also a shame. As the Switch 1 came to the end of its life to make way for the Switch 2, the Wario Land series was one of the few franchises left untouched by the Switch 1. A Switch Wario Land game that returned to the gameplay mechanics of Wario Land 4 and incorporated elements unique to the Switch hardware would have been loved by Wario Land fans specifically and Nintendo fans in general. Unfortunately, it never came to be, but then again, maybe for good reason. Wario did continue on from the Wii in the form of WarioWare, with a Wii U game, a 3DS game and 2 Switch 1 games. In the long run and in the bigger picture, the Wario Land game really did not do that much to differentiate or to distinguish itself from the Super Mario series. Heck, some of those elements intended to make Wario Land games unique now do appear in Super Mario games. The microgames of the WarioWare games, however, do differ from the minigames of the Mario Party games. Therefore, maybe Wario does fit better as the mascot of the WarioWare microgames series than as the mascot for Wario Land platforming games. Thus, I am glad that the Wario Land series ended, and I am happy to know it ended on a more optimistic note than Wario World or Wario: Master of Disguise. I will always look forward to the next WarioWare installment, but I will also fondly reminisce on the nostalgia of a Wario Land game.

Final Ranking
1. Wario Land 4
2. Wario Land 3
3. Wario Land II
4. Wario Land (1)
5. Wario Land: Shake It!
6. Wario World
7. Wario: Master of Disguise

Wario: Master of Disguise

Wario: Master of Disguise
Developer: Suzak
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: DS
System Played On: Wii U (Virtual Console)
Rating: 1 star 

On July 3, 2025, I defeated Terrormisu, thus finishing Wario Master of Disguise for the Nintendo DS (via the Wii U Virtual Console). My playthrough consisted of both the 10 episodes of the story and the 5 special episode time trials (remember this, this will become important later on). In my playthrough, I earned $580,258 in money and treasures, which earned me the title of "Paragon of Disguise," the third highest title in the game. And I did it all in 24 9/10 gameplay hours in 45 gameplay sessions, averaging 33 minutes 12 second per gameplay session, over the span of 3 months. Let me review this game in order of when the things needing critique appear.

Obviously, the story sets the premise of the game. A bored Wario is watching a television show about a master thief named Count Cannoli, who has entitled himself the Silver Zepher. Jealous of Count Cannoli's wealth, Wario invents the Telmet (portmantua of television helmet) to put himself in the television. Now the good guy of the show becomes the bad guy, the bad guy of the show becomes the worse guy, and the worse guy of the show becomes the worst guy. At least it's not predictable in the sense that the TV show's bad guy sees Wario as "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" or that the plot twist is the bad good is really the good guy and the good guy is really the bad guy. Still, the plot of this game felt predictable. The one thing I could appreciate about the antagonists, though, is that one is a caricature of Mario and another is a caricature of Peach. Very fitting for a Wario game.

As if the plot itself is not bad enough, what makes it worse is that the plot is developed over long discourses of information dump. This becomes most evident when dying multiple times to a boss and having to sit through long dialogues to just face off against the boss again. This got so bad that, while the game provides plenty of fair save points, rendering the Wii U Virtual Console restore points useless, I used them just so I wouldn't have to re-read the long dialogues again! Yes, the press of a button or the tap of the screen will make text move with more speed, but I wouldn't call it a fast forward. Yes, I get the developers were trying to communicate, "Look how witty all these thieves are!" but I never found it entertaining. It doesn't matter if you're into books, movies, television or video games, anyone writing for those mediums will tell you long exposition dumps is bad storytelling. Therefore, Wario: Master of Disguise has bad storytelling.

After a long introductory dialogue dumping some exposition, the gamer finally takes control of Wario. If you belong to the 90% of right-handed people, you will move Wario left and right with the left and right of the D-pad, you will crouch with down on the D-pad, and you will jump and ascend ladders/stairs with the up on the D-pad. Everything else will be controlled with the DS touchscreen stylus your right hand. Don't worry if you're the 10% that's left-handed. Left is Y, right is A, crouch is B, and jump/ascend is X. As if Suzak remembering the lefties is cool enough, even more awesome is that you can use both for movement. For example, if you wanted to jump from left to right, Nintendo expected the player to press right/A and up/X at the same time. The game, however, allows the gamer to press right and X at the same time for the same results. I used this option plenty. Sadly, however, all the other controls have to be done with the touchscreen. It's not as bad as Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass or Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks, in which even the movement of Link was controlled by the touchscreen, but it's up there. To perform any attack, the gamer has to tap the enemy. Of course, the player has to first position Wario in close proximity of the enemy for the attack to work, but it still comes down to switching from button controls to touchscreen controls, which can easily be confused, as we will see as this review progresses.

The touchscreen issues become most apparent with the disguises. Of course, it can't be a Wario Land game (yes, I know it technically doesn't have "land" in the title, but most people put any Wario platforming game under the subcategory of "Wario Land") without transformation. Wario: Master of Disguise has 8 disguises Wario can transform into: Thief Wario, Cosmic Wario, Artsy Wario, Genius Wario, Sparky Wario, Captain Wario, Dragon Wario and Wicked Wario. For each transformation, the gamer has to draw a certain shape over Wario: checks for Thief Wario, circle for Cosmic Wario (to represent a space helmet), square/rectangle for Artsy Wario (to represent an easel), a magnifying glass for Genius Wario (looked more like a Greek letter to me), a lightning bolt for Sparky Wario, a semicircle for Captain Wario (I'm guessing a boat hull?), a less than sign for Dragon Wario (like a dragon tail) and a triangle for Wicked Wario (like bat wings). The mnemonic devices makes recalling the symbol for the transformation easy. I can't complain. What I can complain about is the game struggle to recognize these symbols. Constantly the game confused the circle for Cosmic Wario and the rectangle/square for Artsy Wario. Too often the game confused the dragon tail drawing for Dragon Wario with the triangle wing drawing for Wicked Wario. This becomes a problem throughout the  game, especially in the timed special levels, when the game expects the player to transform Wario on demand, yet he or she cannot because the game can't recognize the correct symbol. As if drawing to change costumes isn't bad enough, remember that a lot of these attacks require the gamer to draw on the screen more, which the game further cannot recognize. The worst offender is Artsy Wario. The game almost expect perfect squares to create blocks. One cool thing about this game's transformations is that some can level up to give more powers to the disguise. Cosmic Wario's space gun can ricochet. Artsy Wario can draw more blocks and draw hearts for healing. Genius Wario can punch. Captain Wario can dive with a submarine. Dragon Wario's fire breath can become hotter, destroying blue fire blocks. OK, that last one is lame, for it's just an excuse to create new temporary roadblocks. Lamer is Cosmic Wario's ricochet gun, for the lasers never ricochet where the players wants them to go. Lamest is Artsy Wario. Again, the game has a hard time recognizing the draw of a heart shape, whether big, small, skinny or fat. Even if the player can master drawing a recognizable heart, you can't do it with enemies on screen. Don't even dare during a boss battle (it's like the developers didn't want you to heal during boss battles).

These disguises can be found in treasure chests. Treasure chests hold everything from disguises to keys to money to treasure, depending on its color. All treasure chests are locked. To unlock a treasure chest, you have to play a microgame. Yes, a microgame. By this time, Nintendo has published 5 WarioWare games over the span of 7 years. Wario: Master of Disguise become a game that attempts to combine both Wario Land and WarioWare. There are 8 different microgames, which include connecting dots, tracing drawings, coloring in pictures, matching items with receptacles, squishing roaches, drawing a path and sliding puzzles. A cool thing is that these puzzles do level up, becoming progressively harder once the gamer has become a master expert in the easy puzzles. An uncool thing is that the higher-level puzzles become so hard to the point of becoming impossible. If the player ever fails a microgame, easy or hard, the game boots Wario back out with bombs. Wario must dodge the bombs and re-enter the treasure chest and do another random minigame. This becomes an even bigger pain for the special levels, when everything is on the clock, including the microgame! Yes, the clock continues to run on the microgame. The only fortunate relief is that if the clock expires on the microgame, and the gamer can successfully solve the microgame, the clock will reset. If the player gets stuck with a microgame that is not his or her strength, the player might as well reset the speedrun. If just playing just the 10 episodes of the story, the gamer will find himself or herself ranking puzzles by ease and difficulty, and then purposely losing some microgames in order to get the more favorable microgames. This isn't good game design.

I'll at least give the game credit on the level designs. It could have been way too easy to fall into the Super Mario trap of doing just a basic, generic grass level, desert level, ice level, water level, jungle level, sky level and volcano level. Instead, levels include a cruise ship, a museum, a pyramid, waterworks, a volcano (OK, that one is repeated, but it's taken a new direction with an under-lava experience!), a haunted castle and an ancient garden. As creative and original as these level settings are, they all have flaws. The museum, on the surface, looks creative with puzzles that can be solved with hints in exhibits, but the hints are way to cryptic. The volcano level depends on finding a heat-resistant suit every now and then, and they are hidden, so Wario can die just looking for one. The ancient garden teases the gamer by making it look like all the treasures chests needed to reach the final boss are nearby, but it instead has Wario travel the farthest. These are all flaws that ruin the creative atmosphere.

Most, if not all, episodes end on a boss. The bosses are interesting, and not in a good way. The boss itself gives no hint on a weak spot to defeat said boss. Instead, Goodstyle, Wario's magic wand, provides hints by telling Wario what disguise is necessary to defeat the boss, or at least this certain phase of the boss. This creates a dualist dilemma. Pay attention to Goodstyle's hints, and the boss is too easy. Don't pay attention Goodstyle's hints, and the boss is too hard because the gamer has no idea how to defeat him. I wish there was an option to turn his hints on and off, but I don't think that will solve anything.

Do yourselves a favor. Don't play Wario: Master of Disguise. Instead, watch Dana Carvey's family-friendly comedy Master of Disguise. You'll have a much better time.

Running Ranking
1. Wario Land 4
2. Wario Land 3
3. Wario Land II
4. Wario Land (1)
5. Wario World
6. Wario: Master of Disguise 

Wario World

Wario World
Developer: Treasure
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: GameCube
System Played On: GameCube
Rating: 2 1/2 stars 

On April 1 (no joke), I defeated the Black Jewel, thus finishing Wario World on the Nintendo GameCube! In my playthrough, I collected 51 of 64 treasures, all 40 spritelings, and 7 1/2 of 8 hearts. And I did it all in 11 9/10 gameplay hours over a span of 29 days (a little under a month), averaging 24 3/5 minutes per gameplay session.

I mention the average gameplay session time length because the first thing that stuck out to me was how long it took me to beat a level. Before I talk in depth about that, let me mention that there is only technically 4 worlds with 3 levels, 2 of those levels are 3D platforming collectathons and 1 level is solely a boss battle. 12 levels does not seem like a lot, but considering each level takes 25 minutes (rounded up), now it seems like a lot. Boss battle levels take 25 minutes because the boss has a much health as you, so it's an equal matchup right from the start. 3D platforming collectathon levels take 25 minutes because the levels are massive in size, and they have a lot to do. So what's all there to do in a level?

First, there is treasure collecting. Each 3D platforming collectathon level has 8 treasures in it. In order to collect said treasure, the gamer must press the color button, and then find the corresponding color platform. Collecting all treasures in a platform unlock a microgame from the first WarioWare game, as long as the player has a Game Boy Advance and the link cable. Gamers missing 1 or the other will find this reward useless, and even if the player has both, he or she might just have that WarioWare game, rending the reward even more useless. I at least appreciated that some of the treasures were Nintendo's past and present systems.

Second, there is spriteling collection. Each 3D platforming collectathon level has 5 spritelings, locked away by the Black Jewel for imprisoning the Black Jewel in the first place. At first, this spritelings seem to merely serve the purpose of tutorials and hints, however, they actually impact the ending of the game. The more spritelings Wario saves, the fancier the castle at the end of the credits. Collect all 40 spritelings, and Wario has more treasures than he started. Looking up a solution for another problem, I noticed I already had 36 of 40 spritelings. Therefore, I took the time to find the last four before taking on the end boss. I'm not sure if the ending was worth it, though.

Third, there is red crystal collection. Red crystals unlock the 3D platforming collectathon's boss battle. Each 3D platforming collectathon level has 8 red crystals. Earlier levels on require 3 red crystals, but later levels will require 6. These red crystals are behind trap doors. Sometimes, a simple ground pound/hip drop will break open the trap door, while at other times, only a Piledriver will open the trap door. The trap doors requiring a simple ground pound/hip drop leads to levels similar to Toad's Treasure Tracker. Use the C-stick to navigate through the puzzle to reach the red crystal. The trap doors needing the piledriver lead to levels that remind me of the Super Mario Sunshine levels without FLUUD. Except this time the Wario Land episodes are more doable. Both levels were a nice changeup from the regular gameplay of scouring the level to look for treasures.

Fourth, there is gold statue parts. Each 3D platforming collectathon level has 8 gold statue pieces. Collecting all 8 will earn Wario a half heart, with the hearts maxing out at 8. This power up probably has the most in-game use, as the bosses will level up as the game advances. I got 7 1/2 hearts because I came up short 3 pieces in the last level, which had already given much such a headache just trying to find the end boss. If any gamer chooses just to collection 1 collectable, that gamer better make sure he or she has hearts as the collectable.

Fifth, there are coins to collect, but just like with Treasures, they seem to have little or no value to the after credits scene. The only thing the coins do is allow for extra continues, which also ramps up, maxing out at 500 coins. I ran out of coins nears the final boss battles, so I could not continue. Speaking of coins, Wario does not have the same immortality or transformations as prior games, so if a player falls off a ledge, that player needs to find the box with the hidden spring to launch back into the level. Also, poisonous water exists all around the underworld, which sucks out the hard-earning coins. No joke, on one occasion, I lost 1000+ coins in that underworld. This was more boring and tedious than creative and innovative.  I wish it was axed.

[SPOILER ALERT!] After clearing all 12 levels, the big treasure chest north of the island pops open, revealing Black Jewel. The Black Jewel has 8 lives, rewarding the gamers who took the time to increase their hearts to 8, making it an even fight. Those gamers who did not end are going to find themselves going for an almost perfect run. Here in North America, the Black Jewel only has 1 cycle. The attacks may increase in speed with every passing cycle, but besides that, once the pattern is down, it's smooth sailing to the finish. Japan, on the other end, got more a true boss fight, with the Black Jewel taking center stage in the fight, fighting head on. Man, I wish we got the Japan version [/END SPOILERS!]

In conclusion, I have mixed feelings about Wario World. When on the handheld systems, the Wario Land games naturally progressed from copying Super Mario to becoming its own thing. Besides making the move to 3D, Wario World doesn't seem to go beyond that. No Metroidvania-like traveling. No power-ups besides garlic to give an extra power to Wario. No cutscenes at the beginning or end (instead, the game provides static text and flashes of images). Furthermore, the controls feel off, which makes me doubt if the developers had any experience with platforming games, especially 3D platforming games. The poor lighting made it hard to see ladders. Therefore, with all that in mind, I give Wario World a ranking of 2 1/2 stars. It's somewhere between a bad game and an average game. I would play this game until you get sick and tired of finicky 3D platforming and tedious collecting, and then watch a Let's Play of the rest.

Hey, at least it can't get any worse than this, right? Right?! RIGHT!?! It's going to get worse, isn't it? 

Running Ranking
1. Wario Land 4
2. Wario Land 3
3. Wario Land 2
4. Wario Land 1
5. Wario World 

Wario Land 4

Wario Land 4
Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: Game Boy Advance
System Played On: Wii U (Virtual Console)
Rating: 5 stars 

On March 3, 2025, I defeated the Golden Diva, and earned the best ending on normal, thus finishing Wario Land 4 for the Game Boy Advance (via the Wii U Virtual Console)! In my playthrough, I collected 8 of 16 music tracks (that's half of them!), and I earned $130,270. And I did it all in 10 1/2 gameplay hours over the span of 17 days.

Wario Land 4 clearly has a primarily, secondary and tertiary gameplay loop built into each level. Let's break that down.

The primary gameplay loop is to find the switch in each level, which reopens the portal, allowing Wario to exit. Upon hitting said switch, a timer triggers, and Wario must race back to the portal at the beginning of the level. Yes, Wario Land 4 reintroduces the level timer, and they do so perfectly. The timer does not go off until the switch to trigger the exit becomes activated. Therefore, the game safely assumes that the gamer has explored everything, and he or she only desires to exit the level. Prior to hitting the switch, the player has no time limit, meaning the player can patiently explore the level. Only until the gamer wants to exit that the timer appears. Again, it's that perfect balance of exploring to find collectables and testing the player to see how well he or she knows the level. Yes, sometimes Wario Land 4 change up the level on the return, and yes, the game sometimes places collectables along the return road, but the timer accounts for that, adding more time. Still, even so, a seasoned veteran of video gamers could beat the clock in its own race with time to spare.

The secondary gameplay loop is finding Keyser. See, activating the switch and returning to the portal merely helps Wario escape the level with treasures intact. To actually advance to the next level, the gamer needs to discover Keyser in the level and collect Keyser before exiting the level. Most often, Keyser appears before switch in the level, but sometimes Keyser can show up after the switch activates. Again, the timer accounts for this, giving more time to find a hidden key. To me, this secondary gameplay loop is redundant. Getting out of the level feels like it should come with automatic advancement in the game. Nothing felt more disappointing than making it back to the exit portal, only to then witness the door not opening because the door. Keyser should have come automatically with activating the swtich, or at least come close nearby in every level.

The tertiary gameplay loop is finding the 4 pieces of a jewel. Once all 4 pieces come together, they form a jewel. 4 jewels unlock the door to that boss. Finding these jewels take a little bit more exploration, at least departing from the main path. At first, I thought I would have to a walkthrough for the missing jewel pieces. Upon a second playthrough of the levels, though, I easily saw the spaces I missed within the level, which made me in turn easily find the missing jewel pieces. I guess this is natural progression of how to maneuver Wario and how to navigate the level.

The bosses are really the lowest and weakest point of Wario Land 4. Most of the bosses have hard to see weak points. When the gamer can find these weak points, the bosses have small hit boxes, making  it hard to give and receive blows. On top of that, these bosses are damage sponges. I would have to say that, on average, a boss takes about 12 hits before defeating that boss. Did I also mention that these too are timed? I imagine the high hit count intended to combat the minigame rewards. See, Wario Land 4 has 3 minigames installed in it. These minigames could be the predecessors to WarioWare's microgames. Every time that the gamer reaches a milestone in the minigame, the game rewards that players with a token, which can be spent in the item store. While all items have funky names, they also all deal damage to the boss before Wario can engage in battle. Depending on the boss, some items do more damage, and some do less. I tried doing it item free, but I got too irritated at small hitboxes and damage sponging. Therefore, I grinded in the minigames to save up to enough tokens to buy an item at the item shop for Aerodent and Golden Diva. Since Golden Diva is the final boss, even the best item will only deliver half the damage. For the other bosses, however, the right item will deal all but 1 life in the health bar. It feels like cheating, but it also feels like you have no other choice when it feels like the bosses have an unfair advantage.

[SPOILER ALERT!] The end game is a well-done end game. It may be only 1 level before the final boss, but it's a good example of what an end level should look like. The level tests you on everything the gamer has learned to this point, for the player will need to know it to advance in this level and onward to the next level. On top of that, the developers put the switch for the time right below the portal, forcing the players to fall on it and trigger it immediately. Therefore, on top of the gamers proving they know everything about traversing levels, the gamers also have to prove they can do it with time constraints. The final boss follows the same pattern, as each one of the phases reflects back to a previous boss. Think of it as a boss gauntlet, just summed up in a single final boss. [/END SPOILERS]

While Wario Land 4 looks and feels more like Wario Land 1 and 2 than Wario Land 3, this observation should not be mistaken for a setback. On the contrary, Nintendo figured out a way to utilize the full potential of the Game Boy Advance hardware at launch to deliver a unique gameplay experience. Wario Land 4 reintroduces the timer, as well as adds a life bar, but it does so in a way that still encourages exploration. The addition of the life bar also does a better job of encouraging not taking a hit, for it could lead to a loss of company power. Wario finally has his iconic color palette of canary yellow and light purple, unlike the black and white on the Game Boy Color. The soundtrack, as well as the unlockable soundtracks, match the goofiness of Wario. The theming of the levels does not default to the typical themes found in the Super Mario series (grass land, desert land, water land, ice land, sky land, volcano land, etc.), minus emerald passage. As I play more games in the Wario Land series, and as I hear what other people have to say about these games, I would say these games grow on me with every passing game, instead of distract me. Wario Land 4 is a masterclass of how to do game development correctly, especially in the game mechanics department, as evident in the clear primary, secondary and tertiary gameplay loop naturally built into the game. The delayed and trigger timer allow the gamer the opportunity to explore the level, yet at the same time, it tests the player to see if they know how to traverse the level well. With proper exploration of the level, the game will easily find the switch, Keyser and the jewel pieces, and the player will never have to consult outside help, like a walkthrough. With this masterclass of game design, no wonder so many clones have popped up, like Pizza Tower! Therefore, for all these reasons, I give Wario Land 4 a ranking of 5 stars. Wario Land 4 is very good game, not just for the Wario Land series or a Wario game in general, but for all video games in general. If you can, I would 100% fully complete the game with the best ending on all difficulties.

Unfortunately, in my opinion, Wario Land 4 for will be the height of the Wario Land series. Every other game from here out will focus too much on the gimmick of its console and forgot this masterclass on game design. From here out on out, it will be a competition to just not end up on the bottom.

Running Ranking
1. Wario Land 4
2. Wario Land 3
3. Wario Land 2
4. Wario Land 1 

Wario Land 3

Wario Land 3
Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: Game Boy Color
System Played On: 3DS (Virtual Console)
Rating: 4 1/2 stars 

On February 15, 2025, I defeated the Hidden Figure, thus finishing Wario Land 3 for the Game Boy Color (via the 3DS Virtual Console)! This is the 3rd Wario Land game I have finished. And I did it in 14 3/5 gameplay hours in a span of about 2 weeks / half of a month.

I actually do have some prior experience with Wario Land 3. Sometime during childhood, shortly after getting my Game Boy Color, for either birthday or Christmas, I asked my parents for any Game Boy Color game, just to merely increase my library of Game Boy Color games. Randomly, they got me Wario Land 3. I remember playing the game, and I also remember never finishing it. I remember getting stuck, and with the internet still young and video game walkthrough websites still new, I couldn't find the answer online, so I gave up on the game. This is why, when it came time to sell my Game Boy Color to buy a Game Boy Advance, I included Wario Land 3 as a package deal. Replaying this game as an adult, my childhood frustration of getting lost and getting stuck is still warranted. The only in-game hint system is the temple, in which the Hidden Figure will tell you where to go, and that's it. It tells you neither which color key/chest to go after nor which power up you will need to get there nor were exactly that color key/chest is. While this hint system prevents anybody from becoming lost on where to go, it does not prevent getting lost once there. Luckily for me playing this game again as an adult in 2025, I found a very thorough walkthrough on GameFAQs, which I had to consult plenty, especially near the end of the game. I can't imagine how anyone can get through the game without it.

I wasn't expecting Wario Land 3 to belong to the "Metroidvania" genre. Yes, Wario Land 3 belongs to the Metroidvania genre. The entire game takes place in 1 world. Certain areas of the world map unlock depending on which treasures become unlocked. Certain areas within each level become unlocked by discovering treasure that give certain power ups. This requires a lot of backtracking to older levels, as now certain power ups allow Wario to travel to previously unreachable areas in the level. It was very interesting starting out a Wario Land game with a Wario who did not have all the abilities that he did in Wario Land 1 & 2 from the onset. Once near the end of the game, however, Wario does have all those abilities, and it once again feels natural controlling Wario.

Once again, Wario in Wario Land 3 does not have power ups like a traditional Super Mario game does. At best, Wario regains his abilities by collecting certain treasures, but that's about it. The next closest thing is that certain enemies give Wario status changes, almost like a "power down." In Wario Land 2, these power downs were implemented well, as most often, Wario needed these power downs to access certain parts of an area. While still happens in Wario Land 3, it happens a whole lot less. More often, these power downs become more of annoyance or an inconvenience, as they drag Wario away from where he needs to be. Therefore, I would say that the power downs in Wario Land 3 are done poorly, especially in light of Wario Land 2, where they are done well.

Once again, Wario Land 3 takes an alternative route when it comes to boss battles. Unlike a traditional Super Mario game, Wario cannot lose a life or get a game over in a boss battle (minus the final boss battle). Instead, Wario simply gets booted out of the boss area and has to go back to the boss area to start all over again. Between finishing Wario Land 2 and playing Wario Land 3, I watched a YouTube video which explained why this fits his character as originally a bad guy, and I have to say, I've come to like this way. Nintendo must have received complaints about how long it takes to get back to the boss area, though, for Nintendo fixed that with Wario Land 3. Wario Land 3 has a whole lot of shorter paths to return to the boss battle than Wario Land 2. Still, I would still prefer if the boss battle would allow me to pick up where I left off instead of having to begin the whole ordeal all over again.

You may have noticed I didn't record my progress toward completion. The game really doesn't do a good job of it, especially in comparison to prior games in the series, i.e. no completion percentage after the credits. As a matter of fact, one of the treasures to collect in the game is a magnifying glass, which lets the gamer know which treasures have already been collected without entering the level. Same goes for the music box coins, the other collectable in the game. While I know I collected all 4 treasures in multiple levels, only 1 level I collected all 8 of its music box coins. If previous games could let the player know the completion percentage, then so could this game. I could tell you, however, the game's coin counter maxes out at 999, for I did that a couple of times, including by the end of the game.

Wario Land 3 also has a minigame of minigolf. It does the typical golf video game gameplay, with a meter for both power and accuracy. Personally, I found it hard to control. I felt like the best strategy was to just it the ball as powerfully and accurately as possible and then hope for the best. The courses come up randomly, and it does cost money to play, but finding money becomes quite easy, so it's nothing to fret spending all this money.

In conclusion, to sum everything up, Nintendo continues to experiment on what makes a Wario Land game unique, distinct from a Super Mario game. The first game of the franchise was very linear. The second game of the series experimented with a branching narrative. The only way to go up from branching story was naturally a Metroidvania, which was exactly what Nintendo did. The Metroidvania genre makes Wario Land 3 feel fresh from the rest of the games in the franchise. At first, not having all of Wario's abilities expected from earlier games in the series feels quite frustrating for the seasoned veteran of Wario Land games. As the game progresses, however, the limitation allows and invites the gamer to experiment how to reach goals with said limitations. Despite the lack of game overs due to Wario's inability to die, the game finds way to annoy and frustrate the player to discourage the player from powering through the levels. While overall Wario Land 2 did a better job of the enemies powering down Wario, the power downs in Wario Land 3 further reinforce avoiding enemies, despite the fact Wario can't die. With all this in mind, I therefore give Wario Land 3 4 1/2 stars. It's somewhere between a good game and a very good game. I would play this game until you finish it, and if you liked it well enough, then fully complete it, but do not feel obligated to do so.

Running Ranking
1. Wario Land 3
2. Wario Land 2
3. Wario Land 1 

Wario Land II

Wario Land II
Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Original System: Game Boy Color
System Played On: 3DS (Virtual Console)
Rating: 4 stars 

On February 1, 2025 I got all 5 endings, thus finishing Wario Land II for the Game Boy Color (via the 3DS Virtual Console)! This is the 2nd Wario game that I have finished. In my playthrough, I collected 54% of the treasures and 78% of the picture panels, as well as cleared 100% of the stages. And I did it all in 15 1/4 gameplay hours over the span of 21 days / 3 weeks / 2/3 a month. To change things up, and for the fun of it, I will make my comments with a plus (+) signifying a positive and a minus (-) signifying a negative. Then I will sum up my overall thoughts and feelings in the conclusion.

+The removal of the time clock does encourage exploration.

+Getting power-ups from the enemies instead of an item was definitely a very big positive. The last game felt like random items gave random effects. This time the enemy gives the effects, which have both advantages and disadvantages. Sometimes you actively pursue these power-ups, and at other times, you actively avoid them. Some puzzles even require them.

-The boss throwing Wario out of the ring, causing Wario's handler to retrace steps was an interesting take to boss battles. I would be on board with this change, if it weren't for one detail. When the boss throws Wario out of the room, Wario must begin from the boss battle from the start when he re-enters the room. If the boss battle would have merely picked up where it left off, that would have been fine. It's the fact the boss battles start all over again that has me annoyed by this feature.

-Why is Wario in white, especially in the Game Boy Color? I'm pretty sure he's established as purple overalls and yellow shirt & hat by now (see Mario Kart 64). Of all the systems to not show off Wario's colors, the Game Boy Color is the worst one to do so.

-This game is both linear and non-linear at the same time. On the first playthrough, the game is very linear, as it only gives you the option of 1 ending. The second and thereafter allows for multiple routes for multiple endings. I think multiple endings should be allowed from the onset.

-Wario Land II offers 2 minigames: a picture matching game and a number matching game. Completing all the minigames is required for 100% full completion. Both minigames become easier by putting more money into them. With the amount of money at the end of the game determining the gamer's final ranking in the game, however, both minigames discourage spending the money to make the minigame easier and encourage not spending money, which in turn results in a harder minigame. Putting the least amount of money into the picture matching game results in the pictures instantly flashing before the player's eyes, meaning the player must have immediate reaction. Failure to succeed at this game will result in having to play the minigame again, which costs more money. Putting the least amount of money into the number matching game will only reveal a ninth of the number, which the game has to guess from a range of 0 to 9. Virtually, the gamer is playing a guessing game based on luck, with a 10% probability of winning. Failure to win at this game requires replaying the whole level. Again, the prizes for winning these minigames are collectibles for 100% full completion and nothing more, and even then, they can be a detriment to fully completing the game with a high ranking. It almost feels like whoever plays Wario Land II has to choose whether he or she wants to 100% fully complete the game or go for the highest ranking but not both. Only the most season Wario Land II expert can do both.

In conclusion, to sum everything up, Nintendo continues to experiment on how to make a Wario Land game a unique platforing experience, at least unique from a Super Mario platforming game. The gameplay mechanic utilized to make Wario Land II unique is Wario's immortality. Enemy attacks that would kill Mario either knocks Wario back and costs Wario coins, or in some cases, gives him a power-up, which within itself can either be advantage or disadvantage. For this game, it works! Even though Wario can't die, the gamer won't want to just damage boost through the level. In a game which determines the final ranking based on the amount of currency at the end of the game, the player carefully avoids or attacks enemies, in fear of losing that precious money that will impact the final ranking. Overall, I would say that Wario Land II does a better job of making a Wario Land look and feel unique than its prequel. The prequel merely takes a Super Mario platforming game and gives it a Wario skin. This game stands out as unique in comparison to a Super Mario platforming game in the branching story, Wario's attacks, Wario's power-ups given by enemies and the bosses. Wario Land II is definitely an improvement from its prequel. I give it 4 stars. It's a good game. Make sure you play it until finish, but don't worry about ranking or completion.

Running Ranking
1. Wario Land II
2. Wario Land (1)